02 — Alexa Johara
02 — Alexa Johara
I woke up this morning with the strength to do things I had been too lazy to do for the past few days. As soon as I got up I changed and got into the gym for an hour and a half. Today was leg day — my favourite. Although it had only been a week since I had been out of the gym, for someone who spends multiple days a week sweating it out it felt like I had been ignoring a part of myself.
Admittedly I have put on a lot of weight. Probably less than I think and I feel, but an amount significant enough for my aunties to make remarks about when I’m in Lagos. Why do they do that anyway? If its not, “Ah, Alexa oh I see you have been eating very well in America” it is, “Are they not feeding you abroad? Oh ga oh” I’m never enough.
Today, I forgot all about that. With each motion I made at the gym, I never gave up. I pushed through. Even when my muscles quivered from being out of work my mind did not quit. I went in knowing that I would be victorious. Sometimes I wish I trusted my emotional strength as much as I trust my physical strength. If only there was a gym to exercise my emotions and feelings — a place to learn about its limits, but I guess that’s life?
I dedicated today to myself. This is something that is not usual for me as I am usually thinking or taking care of someone else, but today was mine. I made myself breakfast — set the table, brought out nice cutlery and enjoyed my meal whilst listening to some of my favourite songs. I went to do my hair, something I have been neglecting for a little too long. I did my make up and I went into central London. I watched a movie and I went for a walk. For the first time in a while, I felt re-calibrated. I felt like myself again.
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Alexa Johara | 19 year old nomad traipsing her way through Lagos, London and Providence | http://memoirsofamisfit.wordpress.com/